October 11, 2011. My day of complete freedom in Christ. This is the day I watched the Lord take all of my hurt in his hands. Never to be picked back up by me EVER AGAIN.
June 11, 2012. This is the day the PFA I have had on a very dangerous man is over. Three years ago I received this protection from abuse. I have always struggled with knowing if that was the right thing to do or not. That piece of paper did not protect me from anyone. I have learned that GOD is my protection. I do not need a piece of paper, I have God.
If you would have told me three years ago that today, I would be living in my own apartment, decorated adorably, and ON MY OWN, I would not have believed you. If you would have told me three years ago that today I would be working in a job I ABSOLUTELY love, I would not have believed you. If you would have told me three years ago that today I would be free from this crazy, awful man who tried to destroy me, I would not have believed you. I remember three years ago today, like it was just yesterday. I remember being so scared, hopeless, depressed, used, unable to function, distant from God, alone, abused, fighting for the Diane I used to be, not realizing that was one of the problems in the first place.
Today, I am happy, hopeful, loved, secure, safe, free, joyful, and thankful to God alone, that I am all of these things today. I have learned in the past three years, that as badly as I wanted to go back to the way things were prior to making this man a part of my life, that would never be a reality for me. It is not about going backwards in life. It is all about moving forward, in the direction God so gently guides you in hand in hand. Yes I will in a way always be the Diane I wanted to go back to so badly, but I am even better now because I am embracing the Holy Spirit in my life. He is guiding me to Heaven. There are many moments in these three years that I have seen God. The times when I was able to see Him, feel Him, know He was there, are the happiest times and memories of my life. I cannot wait until those are all of my memories. The day that I am in Heaven with my Mighty Savior, spending every moment feeling Him and seeing Him. The day all the distractions will be gone, and all that is left is Jesus’ hand in mine. I am so thankful to the Lord for the miraculous transformation HE has done in my life. He is my complete satisfaction, He is my all in all, He is all I ever need, He protects me, He keeps me safe, He loves me unconditionally, He is guiding me to Him in Heaven.
I love you more than I could ever describe in words.
Today could have been very different for me. Truly, three years ago, if you would have told me I would not be here today, that I would have either been destroyed by that man or self destructed myself, I would have believed you. It is by the grace of God alone, that I am here today with the story I have to tell. The story of embracing God’s love and letting go of all that desires to keep me from finding the love He has for me. Have you found God’s love today? It is my prayer that you grasp tightly the love of God that is never out of reach! I found and continue to find His love just in time, now you do the same.
Proverbs 18:10 The LORD is a strong-tower, the righteous run into Him and are SAFE.
Thank you Jesus that I am safe!