Why?

How many times have you begged with somebody, why?  Why did you do this, or that?  Why did you hurt me?  Why did you betray me?  Why did you let this or that happen?  Why, why, why, why, why????  What a painful question to have to ask somebody.  Asking why, implies that you have been mistreated in a way God never intended for.   

I have come to absolutely detest starting a sentence with why.  There is no need to.  We will never fully understand why people do things or do not do things.  We will never grasp what is going on in other’s lives.  When we ask why, are we not being completely selfish?  Fighting for an answer to somehow make us feel better, give us some sort of relief.  Does our comfort really come from a watered down, not accurate answer to the question why?  What satisfaction will your heart receive when you finally hear some sort of response to your question: absolutely none (I happen to know this personally).

I remember a time in my life when I asked God, why?  I remember not even being able to speak the question, the pain behind that three lettered word was far too deep it left me speechless.  I believe God detests sentences started with Why just as much as I do. I believe we are not supposed to know why something happened.  God has a purpose and a plan for each of us.  By asking Him why, we are doubting that His plan is best for us, and better than what we think it should be. 

I just recently came across one of my journals from when I was going through a rough time in my life.  Each line on the page had a single sentence on it, all starting with the word, why.  I never found out the answer to any of those questions.  I remember when I wrote down each one of those questions.  I remember wanting peace, closure, comfort, resolution.  I realized something as I was rereading over all of those questions tonight: why questions are not where our comfort falls, our comfort is in God alone.  Knowing the answers will not leave a lasting joy, comfort, and peace to our hearts.  When God promises us that He knows and knows best, we can confidently believe those words.  Knowing God knows the answers to all of my sentences starting with why is what gets me past the wondering.  I am not meant to understand things, I am not meant to know the answers.  If I needed to God would let me know.  All he tells me, (which is more than I ever need to know) is that He loves me with an everlasting love, no matter what I do, and that He is joyful when I trust in Him alone. 

I do not just want to speak the words, I trust God, I do not doubt God.  I want to live out those sentences confidently.  I want those sentences to be backed up by every move I make in life.  I want those sentences to be the reason WHY I never ever, ever have to ask the question Why ever again!

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