My Calling is Your Heart

Of all of the writings I have ever posted on here…this is probably the one I am most excited about!  I have been struggling with this concept of a calling since I returned from India in 2013.  I had this amazing idea of what a calling meant but I just was not convinced that this was from God.  Because my mind is so crazy sometimes, I was certain this revelation was a product of my craziness not God’s faithfulness.

I just love the way God works.  He really does do all things in His perfect timing.  This idea first crossed my mind on March 31, 2014 and I have been praying for God to confirm this idea to me ever since.  Almost exactly one year later I was able to attend International Justice Mission’s Annual Global Prayer Gathering.  1400 children of God gathered together with the heroes who serve on the front lines in the battle against the world’s most heinous injustices imaginable to pray, bold prayers to God in Heaven.  The only way I can describe this event to you is as if it was a sliver of Heaven came to Earth as we raised our voices together for those who have no voice in this fight to the Only One who not only hears our petitions but also answers in ways that we could never imagine.

Hearing countless stories of answered prayer was not only encouraging, but also humbling.  This work we do in life is not us, it is all God, it was good to be reminded of this timeless truth.

I never thought I would find the confirmation I was earnestly seeking at this conference, but God had a purpose for me walking through the doors of that auditorium and confirmation was a part of His plan.  I could have just jumped up with joy as I heard the following words from one of the first speakers of the weekend:

“He has placed something of His heart in us.”

With those words came my confirmation that my idea was indeed God’s idea all along.  And that is why I am so excited!  I cannot wait to share what God has laid on my heart with you.  I pray as you read you are encouraged, jump with joy if you must and thank God in Heaven for His marvelous ways!

I will start from the beginning-ish.

I found myself out of a very traumatic event in my life.  This event left me with a shattered heart.  Each piece held so much pain, shame, betrayal, and horror.  Long story short, God Himself healed my broken heart, binding up each and every wound.  (Psalm 147:3)  There are sorrow and joy-filled tear stains on the page of my Bible where this verse lays.  I am so thankful to God.  After begging, and pleading, and crying to Him to heal my broken heart, He did just that!

A couple months after receiving this new heart from God, my friend invited me to a Bible Study.  The study was on Nehemiah.  The speaker for this study asked us to pray the following prayer:

“God, please break my heart for what breaks yours.”

She warned us that when we pray this prayer, God will answer.  This request left me confused.  I had just begged and pleaded with God to heal my broken heart, and now with my healed heart I was supposed to ask Him to break it?  This just did not make much sense to me.  I went home that night asking God to help me understand.

Not fully comprehending this prayer, I prayed from the most humble part of my heart:

God, my heart is supposed to break for what breaks yours, if my heart is not already breaking, please break it for what breaks yours.  Amen.

Slowly God started to show me exactly what broke my heart.  These breaks were very different from the shattering ones I had faced many years ago.  When my heart was broken viciously by someone I was left feeling dead inside.  This newly broken heart from God was quite different, it left me feeling alive inside!  When my heart was broken by the wrong one, I felt hopeless.  When my heart was broken by the right One, I was filled with hope for this brokenness.

Shortly after all of these “broken heart” prayers and revelations I read in Genesis where the Bible tells us The Lord’s heart was filled with pain (Gen. 6:6).  I had read this verse many times but when I read it this time in that moment, the words touched my heart in a new way and I could not help but to cry!  This verse reminded me that when my heart was broken, God’s was too.  I desire for my heart to continue to break because His does too.

I truly believe God has prepared for each of us a piece of His broken heart.  This piece is just for you.  It is the best piece for you.  Everything you have been through has been preparing you for this broken piece.  God knew you would have this piece before you were born.  How amazing.  Our hearts are broken by a piece of God’s.  He loves us so much and has created us for a perfect purpose in Him that He gently gives us a piece of His heart that is breaking not for any other reason than this:

But rejoice, inasmuch as ye are partakers of Christ’s sufferings; that, when his glory shall be revealed, ye may be glad also with exceeding joy.  1 Peter 4:13 KJV

We will not be broken forever.  There will be joy throughout the breaks and there will be exceedingly more when Christ’s glory is revealed.

Bottom Line: Our calling in this life is the broken piece of God’s heart given to us.  When we let Him place something of His heart in us, we are accepting this brokenness, this call, because we know God is going to bring healing to a heart that was broken by the wrong hands.  We know we will see His glory through and through.

I do not know if this makes sense to anyone other than me.  But I feel so compelled to share this so I am convinced it will make sense to at least one other heart out there.

Give us courage to pray a bold prayer of brokenness.  Give us a willing spirit to accept your brokenness, our calling.  Give us Your power to do every single thing You desire for us to do.

Thank you Jesus for just being all powerful-You 🙂